Tabak ist nur eines von hunderten Produkten, die einen langsam umbringen.
Tact is making your guests feel at home even though you wish they were.
Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy.
Täglich hören tausende auf, zu rauchen. Sie sterben.
Täglich sterben etwa 50000 Menschen. Wieso bist Du eigentlich nie dabei?
Take care of yourself. Spare parts for old models like you are out of stock.
Take Me To Your Leader.
Take my advice - I'm not using it anyway.
Taking backups is easy. It's the restores that cause the headaches.
Takt heißt wissen, wie weit man zu weit gehen darf.
Takt ist für Leute, die für Sarkasmus zu doof sind.
Talking shit about a person is not OK. Talking truth about a shitty person is.
Tanga: polynesisch für "Arsch frißt Hose"
Tankwart auf arabisch: Gibdir ben Zin
TANSTAAFL
Tarne nie deinen Rat! (Palindrom)
Taschenlampe: Aufbewahrungsort für leere Batterien
Tassen hast Du zwar alle im Schrank - aber Plastikbecher fehlen ein paar.
Tass' Kaff, Tass' Kaff, Tass' Kaff...
Tastatur: Wichtigstes Zubehör für Spracherkennungs-Software
Tat er alkoholfrei? Er floh. O klare Tat! (Palindrom)
Tau entsteht, wenn die Sonne auf das Gras scheint und es zum Schwitzen bringt.
Tausche bessere Hälfte gegen zwei Viertel - auch gerne späteres Baujahr.
Tausendfüßler auf italienisch: Molto Bene
Tausend tapfere Tschechen trotzen zwölf schwertschwingenden Tscherkessen.
TB or not TB - this is (cough cough) the question.
tcA thgirypoC muinnelliM latigiD eht detaloiv tsuj evah uoY
Teachers are people who talk in someone else's sleep.
Teach what you know to those that can use it, and sell to the rest.
Tea is like a hug in a cup.
"Teamfähig": stimmt jedem bei jeder Gelegenheit zu.
Team work is essential. It allows you to blame someone else.
Teamwork ist, wenn alle das Gleiche wollen wie ich.
Tears are the sad bits leaving us to make room for the happy bits to flourish.
Techno entsteht, wenn die Soundkarte defekt ist.
Techno Unplugged!
Teenagers have one purpose: showing parents why some animals eat their offspring
Tel Aviv, Mondamin!
Telephonsex? Aber das Ding geht doch gar nicht in den Hörer 'rein!
Television is a medium because it is neither rare nor well done. (Ernie Kovacs)
Tellerrand ist abgebrannt.
Tell the truth, then duck and run.
Tennis? Da schau ich ja noch lieber Ölfarbe beim Trocknen zu!
Tennis ist 90% mental... Die andere Hälfte ist physisch.
"Tesafilm" ist ein Anagramm von "fast Leim".
Testing testing testing 1 2 3 4 5 6 - - OK.
Tests made in third-world countries indicate that Napalm "stings really bad".
Tests made with laboratory rats have proven that death is over 99% fatal.
Tests made with laboratory rats have shown that living in cages causes cancer.
Test tube babies have a womb with a view.
TeX ist was für Leute mit DaX-Schaden.
Texte mit der Maus bearbeiten ist wie Suppe mit der Zange essen.
THANK YOU FOR NOT BREEDING
Thank you for noticing this notice. Your noticing it has been noted.
"Thank you, sir!" - "Don't call me sir!" - "Thank you, Ma'am!"
That moment when some awkward shit happens and you realize there's a meme for it
That moment when the door clicks shut and you realize all your keys are inside
That moment when waiting for your coffee you realize you didn't press the button
That moment when you finish your ice cream and start nibbling on the stick
That moment when you flush the toilet and the water starts rising
That moment when you hear a saucy story being told and realize it's about you
That moment when you inspect your booger and feel the nosebleed begin
That moment when you pray it's just a fart - but then it isn't.
That moment when your chair leans back further than you intended it to
That moment when you realize it was a permanent marker
That moment when you realize that it is not Friday, but only Wednesday
That moment when you realize that waiting for the waiter makes you the waiter
That moment when you realize they weren't waving at you
That moment when you're on a dangerous mission and realize you wear a red shirt
That moment when your lollipop falls on the carpet
That moment when you said something and the whole room falls silent
That moment when you step back to look for your glasses and hear "crunch"
That moment when you wake up and don't know which year it is
That's the trouble with paradigms: Shift happens.
that that is is that that is not is not is that it it is
That which does not kill us just postpones the inevitable.
That which does not kill you has made a tactical error.
That which doesn't crash the network will make it stronger.
That which doesn't kill us makes our drinks stronger.
That which doesn't kill you will mutate and try again.
That which doesn't kill you... will probably try again.
That which hits the fan does not necessarily get distributed evenly.
The active ingredient in Viagra is called Mycoxafillin.
The answer is 42, for arbitrary values of 42.
The answer is "sex". The question doesn't matter.
Theatre is life. Film is art. Television is furniture.
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
The bad news: There's no key to the universe. The good news: It isn't locked.
The bad news: Time flies. The good news: You're the pilot.
The best argument against democracy is a conversation with the average voter.
The best laid plans of mice and men gang aft agley.
The best science is always subversive.
The best thing about being dead is that it's only painful for others.
The best thing about change is that the only thing that changes is the change.
The best thing about dying is that you'll forget the experience very quickly.
The best thing about having a penis is sharing it with people who don't.
The best things in life are actually quite expensive.
The best things in life are free, but you can give 'em to the birds and bees.
The best things in life are free. This is especially true for software.
The best things in life aren't things.
The best war is one you don't have to fight in.
The best way to change a woman's mind is to agree with her.
The best way to predict the future is to invent it.
The big problem with children is that they grow up to be people. (B.White)
The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb.
The blues isn't about feeling better. It's about making others feel worse.
The carefully considered application of terror is also a form of communication.
The "c" in "rap" is silent.
The clarity is devastating, but where is the ambiguity?
The class of the lass is inversely proportional to the mass of the ass.
The collective noun for baboons is "congress".
The collective noun for bankers is "wunch".
The computer said "TYPE MISMATCH". So I typed "MISMATCH". It didn't help.
The cookie was worried because its mother was a wafer so long.
The correct reponse to "Don't try this at home" is "Hold my beer".
The data you have entered suggest you're in desperate need of a cup of coffee.
The day you stop playing is the day you start getting old.
The death of God left the angels in an awkward position.
The difference between doing it and not doing it is doing it.
The difference between hard and light? ....You can sleep with a light on.
The difference between roast beef and pea soup? ....Anyone can roast beef.
The differential of hi over ho is ho de hi minus hi de ho over ho ho.
The early bird deserves the worm.
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
The early worm catches the fish.
The e-mail of the PCs is deadlier than the mail.
The evil are guilty, and create Law. The good are innocent, and create Justice.
The facts, although interesting, are irrelevant.
The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're a genius.
The fact that people confuse entomology and etymology bugs me beyond words.
The farmer may allow you to cross the field for free, but the bull charges.
The first Micro$oft product that won't suck will probably be a vacuum cleaner.
The first vacuum cleaner was a suck-cess.
The Flat Earth Society has members all around the globe.
The four-colour theorem is false on any surface for which it is false.
The four "F"s of survival: fighting, fleeing, feeding, and mating.
The four seasons are salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar.
The fundamental flaws of M$ products are hidden by their superficial flaws.
The future is a thing of the past.
The future is such a pain because it never seems to get here on time.
The future will be better tomorrow.
The future will be better tomorrow.
The geek shall inherit the earth.
The gender neutral term for "sugar daddy" is "glucose guardian".
The gene pool has no lifeguards.
The generation of random numbers is too important to be left to chance.
The gods do not protect fools. Fools are protected by less foolish fools.
The good die young - because living isn't fun if you've got to be good.
The good news is that you're normal. The bad news is that there isn't a cure.
The good news is there's no bad news; the bad news is there's no good news.
The grass is greener on the other side. The water bill is higher, too.
The greatest mistake you can make is not doing something for fear of making one.
The harder you try, the dumber you look.
The hardest challenge is having the patience to let someone else do it.
The heretic is cast out not because he is wrong but because he might be right.
The hidden flaw never remains hidden.
The hurrieder you go, the behinder you get.
The increase rate in the downward trend of inflation rise went down last month.
The information presented in this message has been carefully for reliability.
The Institute of Unfinished Research has concluded that 6 out of 10 people
The invisible and the non-existent look very much alike.
Their is sumthing rong wit your komputer, ewe just cant figyour out watt!
The keyboard is mightier than the mouse.
The Keyboard is Mightier Than the Sword.
The last bug isn't fixed until the last user is dead.
The leading cause of cancer in laboratory mice is research.
The light at the end of the tunnel is an illuminated "NO EXIT" sign.
The light at the end of the tunnel is probably just some idiot with a match.
The 'l' in 'user' is silent.
The longer you live the more you realize that something is fucked up.
The main problem with most jobs is that you're expected to actually work.
The matador who's getting bored, will be (the fans are betting) gored.
The meek shall inherit the earth - after it has been fucked up beyond repair.
The meek shall inherit the earth. The rest of us will escape to the stars.
The Micro$oft Torque Wrench: "What Do You Want To Shear Today?"
The minute you've got it, it's already gone.
The more damage a mistyped command causes, the faster it executes.
The more the universe seems comprehensible, the more it also seems pointless.
The more you run over a dead cat, the flatter it gets.
The more you weigh the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe. Eat cake.
"the morse code" is an anagram of "here come dots".
The most exciting phrase in science is not "Heureka!", but "That's funny..."
The most important financial question is: "Where is the money?"
The most incomprehensible thing about the universe is that it's comprehensible.
The mower is mightier than the sward.
The Next Big Thing: Buzzword-Oriented Programming
...the next time someone asks you if you're a god, you say: "Yes."
The noise your computer emits is mainly the sound of data hitting the stack.
The object-oriented model provides a structured way to write spaghetti code.
The older you get, the better you used to be.
The only consistent feature of all of your dissatisfying relationships is you.
The only language used by all programmers is profanity.
The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves.
The only real difference between an oral and rectal thermometer is the taste.
The only thing certain about the future is that it hasn't happened yet.
The only thing worse than a male chauvinist pig is the female version.
The only time you should set the bar low is for limbo.
The only truly intuitive user interface is the nipple. Everything else sucks.
The only warning message some people take seriously is "LOW BATTERY"
The only way to find out what's possible is to try the impossible.
The only way to have a friend is to be one.
The opera ain't over 'til the fat lady sings.
Theoretiker: jemand, der praktisch nur denkt.
Theoretiker sind Leute, die praktisch nur denken... Und Praktiker ist pleite.
Theorie ist, was man nicht versteht. Praxis ist, was man nicht erklären kann.
Theorie und Praxis stimmen in der Theorie besser überein als in der Praxis.
The past is dead. The paster, the deader.
The penalty for doing it right the first time is not appearing busy.
The pen is mightier than the pig.
The penis mightier than the sword?
The pen is mightier than the sword, but a hand grenade beats 4 aces.
The pen is mightier than the sword - But swords don't leak in your pocket!
The pen is mightier than the sword (for very small swords and very sharp pens).
The plough was a groundbreaking invention.
The polite way to subtly tell a luser to piss off is "Piss off, luser".
The possibility that you are going to fuck up is non-zero.
The precious moments after waking up - before you remember who and what you are.
The price you pay for longevity is having to watch your friends die.
The problem is people, but this will be fixed in the next major release.
The problem with a nymphomaniac is when the nympho goes away the maniac stays.
The problem with the French is that they have no word for entrepreneur.
The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
The quantum ground state of women is discontent.
The quick brown bull jumped on the lazy cow.
The rane in Spane stase manely in the planes.
The rayn in Spayn stays maynly in the playns.
There Ain't No Such Thing As Too Much Glitter.
There ain't nothin' but crap on the internet, but there is a lot of it.
There are 10 kinds of people: Those who understand binary, and those who don't.
There are 2 kinds of O/S's: Unix, and brain-farts.
There are dancers that can can-can and ones that can't can-can.
There are far too many businesses like showbusiness!
There are lots of well-designed GUIs - but most users don't have enough arms.
There are many drawbacks to using geese as car horns.
There are many more things that don't exist than things that do.
There are only 2 secrets in the universe: 1) Don't give away all your secrets.
There are only two industries that refer to their customers as "users".
There are other operating systems than Unix - but they don't work.
There are some jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work.
There are vastly more ways for things to be different than to be identical.
There are vastly more ways of being dead than ways of being alive.
The reason why everybody around you is pissed might be that you're a dick.
There is a highway to hell, but only a stairway to heaven. Go figure.
There is always one more son-of-a-bitch than you counted on.
There is a time for everything. Mostly, it is the wrong time.
There is never a right way of doing the wrong thing.
There is no editor but Emacs, and Unix is its prophet.
There is no god, and Murphy is His prophet.
There is no gravity... the earth sucks.
There is no greater threat to progress than the phrase "That's impossible."
There is no 'I' in "Team".
There is no such thing as being too clear.
There is nothing as frightening as ignorance in action.
There is nothing even half as worth doing than simply messing about in boats.
There is nothing new under the sun, but lots of old things we don't know.
There is no truth that can't be turned into a lie by taking it too seriously.
There is no try, only do.
The Religious Right is neither.
There may be life before coffee, but I'm usually not interested.
There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like a fool.
There's a fool born every minute - but they don't die that fast.
There's a lesson to be learned from stupidity. It is: Don't Be Stupid!
There's a sucker born every minute, but swallowers are harder to find.
There's a thin line between pleasant and boring.
There's a vas deferens between children and no children.
There's great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe.
There's no Bürste like Klobürste!
There's no business like show business. And there's no job like blow job.
There's no 'I' in "team", but there's a 'U' in "sucker".
There's no pants like no pants.
There's no place like ~/
There's no place like ::1
There's no place like ::1
There's no place like 127.0.0.1
There's no point in having a strategy if you're not pretending to follow it.
There's no such thing as strong coffee... just weak people!
There's no wrong way to eat a Rhesus.
The results of your IQ test were negative.
There was not enough time to compose a short message, so this is a long one.
There will be an extra day between today and tomorrow. Pass it on.
Thermodynamics: Things run down. You can't win. You can't even break even.
The road to success is always under construction.
The secret for longevity is remembering to keep breathing.
The secret of being right every time is never being wrong.
The secret of patience is doing something else in the meantime.
The secret to creativity is knowing how to hide your sources.
The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.
These days, chemistry jokes are terrible because all the good ones Argon.
These days, for most employers "hire" is a four-letter word.
These days, politics is using truth-like lies to counter fake-sounding truth.
The sick sixth Sikh sheik's sixth sheep's sick.
The simplest explanation is that it just doesn't make sense.
The simplest solutions are often the cleverest. They are also usually wrong.
The sky's the limit - except in skydiving, where it's the ground.
The smartphone is the number one hand held device, followed by the penis.
The solution for most problems is simply to simplify.
The sound of one hand clapping is that of a slap in the face.
The sound of Perl is the sound of a wall no one's banging his head against.
The speed of time is 1 second per second
The squeaking wheel doesn't always get the grease. Sometimes it gets replaced.
The system is going down now. Do your own thinking for the rest of the day.
The system is throwing up. Please wait.
The system will be down the next 10 days for preventive maintenance.
The telegraphist's daughter didit, didit, didit...
The thing I dislike most about Adele's songs is people singing Adele's songs.
The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted.
The trouble is, if you don't risk anything, you risk even more.
The trouble with clichés is that they are so boringly true.
The trouble with common sense is that it's not very common.
The trouble with life is the lack of cool background music.
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
The trouble with troubleshooting is that trouble occasionally shoots back.
The universe is a big place... perhaps the biggest.
The universe is made of protons, neutrons, and electrons, but mostly morons.
The universe is simple. It's the explanation that's complex.
The universe seems to me to be exactly what it seems to be.
The Unix FORTRAN optimizer is invoked with "rm *.f".
The use of bagpipes in warfare was banned in 1863 as being excessively cruel.
The weather is here. Wish you were beautiful.
The Web is not the real world. It usually doesn't even resemble the real world.
The web isn't better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble.
The whatchamacallit has to be whatever or else the whosits will go hey-hey.
The whole of Nature is Chaos - A Fract all should know.
The world gets a little better every day and worse in the evening.
The world is changed mainly by people who don't know what can't be done.
The world is coming to an end. Please exit on the right-hand side.
The world is coming to an end. Please log off.
The world is full. Go away.
The world is going to hell in a handbasket because nice men don't get to breed.
The world isn't going to end with a bang, but with a Wintel machine.
The world owes you nothing. It was here first. (S.Clement)
The worst form of ignorance is to reject something you know nothing about.
The X server is probably the biggest program that doesn't do anything for you.
They found a cure for manic depression. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
They found my still on Blueberry Hill.
They're coming to take me away, ha-haa!
They say you can't do it. But sometimes it doesn't always work.
They who can, do. Those who can't, teach. He who can't either, administrates.
They who don't believe that the dead will rise again, are no coffee drinkers.
Thimk!
Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
Things are more like they are today than they've ever been before.
Things are more like they used to be than they are now.
Things are only impossible until they are not.
Things are worst when they appear best.
Things coming to those who wait are things left by them who went there first.
Things fall down if unsupported. Proof is left as an exercise to the reader.
Things have never been like how you think they used to be.
Things should not happen to you. You should happen to others.
Things that are easy to learn are not necessarily easy to use.
Things that cannot possibly break down are impossible to repair when they do.
Things that go away by themselves can come back by themselves.
Things that only look like things often look more like things than things do.
Think different. But think!
Think digital, act analog.
THINK! ....or THWIM.
THINK PIG.
"Third Party Software": Micro$oft expression for "worms, trojans and viruses"
Thirteen thirsty thrushes thrust through a thick thicket.
This face:-| left blank intentionally
This is an imaginary message. Please rotate your screen 90° before reading it.
This is a private message. Please do not read.
This -> [ ] is a 'Scratch and Sniff' panel. It smells like glass.
This is impossible. Maybe even difficult.
This is life but not as you know it Jim.
This is unfuckingbelievable!
This is your computer. Do not fold, staple or mutilate. Kicking is all right.
This land is your land. This land is my land. You stay on your land.
This message also available in white
This message automatically becomes portable when carried.
This message has been read by more people than your blog.
This message is a link. Click it.
This message is an undocumented feature.
This message is a perfect failure to communicate.
This message is a sensitive object. Do not mold, findle or sputilate.
This message is as politically correct as possible under the circumstances.
This message is a true statement, for sufficiently false values of true.
This message is a virus. Reading it infects your computer. DO NOT READ IT!
This message is best viewed through the bottom of a beerglass.
This message is completely pissed. We apologize for the incontinence.
This message is currently unable to convey a message as it is already doing so.
This message is dead until further notice.
This message is fully buzzword-compliant.
This message is genetically manipulated and may contain traces of nuts.
This message is meaningless.
This message is out of order, please use another one.
This message is shaken, not stirred.
This message is shareware. If you like it, pay me $25.
This message is undergoing maintenance. We apologize for the inconvenience.
This message may or may not contain sarcastic content; you decide.
This message requires a plug-in for text/plain. Click *HERE* to download.
This message ripe when yields to gentle pressure
This message safe when taken as directed.
This message slippery when wet
This message subject to change without notice
This message temporarily out of order
This message void where prohibited by law
This message would be shorter if there had been more time to write it.
This mind left blank intentionally
This motivational message is out of order. If you want to give up, give up.
THIS SCREEN WILL SELF-DESTRUCT IN TEN SECONDS.
This sentance four erors.
This sentance wrong.
This space [ ] left blank unintentionally
This space left unblank intentionally
Thistle sifters sift sieves of unsifted thistles into sieves of sifted thistles.
This world needs more betterness and less worseness!
THOR: Thandinavian god of acheth and painth.
Those two want to go to the zoo, too; they're aware bears bare their hair there.
Those who can, do. Those who can't, hire others.
Those who deny the existence of dragons are often eaten by dragons. From within.
Those who do not understand Unix are doomed to reinvent it - poorly...
Those who fail to plan, plan to fail.
Those who say it can't be done are usually interrupted by those doing it.
Those who stand for nothing are apt to fall for anything.
Those who study history are doomed to watch others repeat it.
Those who think they know everything are annoying to those of us who do.
Those who understand, work; those who create, rule.
Though this be madness, yet there's method in't!
Thou hast mail.
Thou shalt not be a couch spud on sunday mornings.
Thou shalt not droppeth thy leatherman onto live motherboards.
Thou shalt not follow a NULL pointer; chaos and madness await thee at its end.
Thou shalt not let thy airspeed stall, lest the earth rise and smite thee!
Three blokes in a pub: "One beer!" - "Me too!" - "Me, three!"
Three quarks for Muster Mark!
Three things are certain: Death, taxes, and lost data. Guess which has occurred.
Thrillsville.
Throw lots of shit against the wall. See what sticks. Call it Good.
Thunfisch schmeckt einfach nicht ohne ein bißchen Delphin.
Ti ci stizzisci? E stizziscitici pure!
Tief ausatmen... bis 1000 zählen... tief einatmen... und weiter gehts!
Tiefkühlkost läßt sich besser kauen, wenn man sie vor dem Verzehr auftaut.
Tierisch abgetörnt ey.
Tierisch abgewixt ey.
Tierisch geil ey.
TILT!
T I M B E R!
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Time flies like wind. Fruit flies like pears.
"Time is honey" sagte die Biene.
Time is nature's way of preventing everything from happening all at once.
Timeout Error: More than 10 seconds since last error
Time out error - user too slow
Times must already be pretty good when you have time to wait for better times.
Time wounds all heels.
Tims Ella tat alles mit. (Palindrom)
Tip für Raucher: niemals einen Drachen um Feuer bitten!
Tired of being fat and ugly? Try being just ugly for a change.
'Tis an ill wind that blows not for change.
'Tis better to have loved and lost than to be stuck with the bitch forever.
'Tis better to have loved and lost than to have paid for it and not liked it.
'Tis better to have loved a short woman than never to have loved a tall.
To beep or not to beep - this is the question.
To be number one, you have to be odd.
To be what you are not, you must not be.
To boot or not to boot - this is the question.
To create artificial intelligence, you must first destroy natural stupidity.
To cut military spending, from next year all guns will be coin-operated.
Tod allen Fanatikern!
Today is a day like any other day, only more so.
Today is not yesterday's tomorrow, but tomorrow's yesterday.
Today is the last day of your life - so far.
Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday.
To decide not to decide is to decide. To fail to decide is failure.
To discover the limits of the possible, one must venture into the impossible.
Töpfer: Tontechniker
To err is human, to Arr is pirate.
To err is human; to moo is bovine.
To err is human, to really foul things up requires a computer.
To err is human... to really fuck up things requires the root password.
To get maximum attention, it's hard to beat a good, big mistake.
Toilettenfrauen organisieren sich in der IG Druck und Papier.
Toleranz: Die Einsicht, daß es keinen Sinn hat, sich aufzuregen
To live forever, acquire a chronic disease and take care of it.
Tolkien is hobbit forming.
To make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe.
To make your death easier on your loved ones, be an asshole your entire life.
Tomorrow is cancelled. Pass it on.
Tomorrow is the second day of the rest of your life.
Tonari no takegaki ni take tatekaketa kattakara, takegaki ni take tatekaketa.
Tonight's a nice night for an evening.
"Ton thé t'a-t-il oté ta toux?" - "Oui, mon thé m'a oté ma toux."
Too many errors. Make fewer.
Too many:-('s.
Too much blood in coffee.
Too much of anything is bad, but too much whiskey is just right.
Too much quantum tunnelling is bad for you.
Too much reality can kill you.
Too Stupid to Understand Science? Try Religion.
To pee or not to pee - this is the question.
To question or not to question - that is the answer!
To reach The Fields Of Reason, one often has to scale The Cliffs Of Idiocy.
To remove dust from the eye, pull the eye down over the nose.
Torfkopp!
Torfnase!
Torheit schützt vor Alter nicht.
Tornado: Wirbelsäule
Tote Hose hier.
To tell a woman she has the right to remain silent is quite useless.
Tot sein beruhigt.
Tot sein entspannt.
Tot sein hilft gegen Schweißfüße.
Tot sein ist atemberaubend.
Tot sein ist nicht schlimm, man merkt's ja nicht. Nur den anderen stinkt's.
Tot sein löst Figurprobleme.
Tot sein macht apathisch.
Tot sein macht arbeitsunfähig.
Tot sein macht cool.
Tot sein macht einsam.
Tot sein macht Falten.
Tot sein macht frigide.
Tot sein macht geistesabwesend.
Tot sein macht Haarausfall.
Tot sein macht impotent.
Tot sein macht kaltschnäuzig.
Tot sein macht lethargisch.
Tot sein macht Mundgeruch.
Tot sein macht nicht glücklich, aber es beruhigt.
Tot sein macht schlank.
Tot sein macht sorgenfrei.
Tot sein macht unfruchtbar.
Tot sein macht vergeßlich.
Tot sein macht wortkarg.
Tot sein macht zerstreut.
Tot sein senkt den Blutdruck.
Tot sein senkt den Cholesterinspiegel.
Touch not the cat bot a glove.
Toupet or not toupet - this is the question.
Tourette's Syndrome is a funny fuckin' disease.
Tout chasseur sachant chasser doit savoir chasser sans son chien.
Tout le monde, paniquez alors!
Toys are made in heaven; batteries are made in hell.
Trabbi auf französisch: Carton de blamage
Trabbi - die Kraft der zwei Kerzen!
Tradition is just peer pressure from dead people,
Tradition ist Bewahrung des Feuers und nicht Anbetung der Asche.
Trägt der Hirsch 'n Schal im Wald, ist's für die Jahreszeit zu kalt.
Träume misten nachts das Gehirn aus.
Träume sind Antworten auf Fragen, die wir wach nicht formulieren können.
Träume sind oft eine Nummer zu groß, damit wir hineinwachsen können.
Tranfisch!
Traue einer Regierung nur so weit, wie Du ihren Chef werfen kannst.
Traue keinem, der immer ehrlich ist.
Traue keinem, der sich die Achselhaare über die Glatze kämmt.
Traue keinem, der sich die Arschhaare über die Glatze kämmt.
Traue keinem, der sich die Augenbrauen über die Glatze kämmt.
Traue keinem, der sich die Brusthaare über die Glatze kämmt.
Traue keinem, der sich die Nasenhaare über die Glatze kämmt.
Traue keinem, der sich die Sackhaare über die Glatze kämmt.
Traue keinem, der sich die Schamhaare über die Glatze kämmt.
Traue nie einem Elektriker ohne Augenbrauen.
Traue nie einem Guru mit kurzen Haaren.
Traue niemandem, der fünf Tage blutet, und dann immer noch nicht tot ist.
Traue niemandem, der mit den Fingern bis 1023 zählen kann.
Trau' keinem Betriebssystem, bei dem Du nicht an den Quellcode 'ran kommst...
Trau keinem Computer, dem Du nicht den Netzstecker rausziehen kannst.
Trau keinem Zitat, das du nicht selbst aus dem Zusammenhang gerissen hast.
Trau keiner Regierung, die Dir nicht traut.
Traumjob heißt nicht, daß Du während der Arbeit schlafen darfst!
Traun fürwahr!
Traun, Herr Ritter, wollet Ihr nit vom Rosse herab und ein klin Kötzlin tun?
Trees hit cars only in self-defence.
Treffen sich zwei Eintagsfliegen. Sagt die eine: "Was machst'n morgen?"
Treffen sich zwei Gene, Sagt das eine: "Halogen!"
Treffen sich zwei Ionen im Plasma. Sagt das eine "Tachyon".
...treffen sich zwei Jäger im Wald. Beide tot.
Treffen sich zwei Leberkäse. Sagt der eine: "Bist Du auch ein Warmer?"
"Treiben Sie Extremsport?" - "Ja, ab und zu widerspreche ich meiner Frau."
Treib Sport oder bleib gesund.
Trekkies work out at the He's Dead Gym.
Trentatre trentini entrarono in Trento, tutti i trentratre trotterellando.
Trespassers will be beaten, stabbed and stomped. Survivors will be prosecuted.
Trespassers will be shot. Survivors will be shot again.
Tres tristes tigres tragaban trigo en un trigal en tres tristes trastos.
Triangelspieler verdingt sich im Orchester. Entlassen!
Trinken für den Frieden - schmiedet Schwerter zu Zapfhähnen!
Trinke niemals unverdünntes Wasser!
Trinkst Du noch, oder säufst Du schon?
Trinkst Du täglich Apfelsaft, brauchst' zum Scheißen wenig Kraft.
Trinkst' vom Sauerkraut den Saft, brauchst' zum Scheißen keine Kraft.
Trinkt kein Wasser, darin haben Fische gefickt.
Trinkt kein Wasser, weil: Wasser rostet!
Trost gibt Dir in allen Dingen Ritter Götz von Berlichingen.
Trouble always starts as fun.
True ingenuity is often met with resistance from mediocre minds. (A.Einstein)
True logic is applicabe in every direction.
True loneliness is being alone in a crowd.
Trug Tim eine so helle Hose nie mit Gurt? (Palindrom)
Trust Micro$oft only to be spectacularly unable to do anything right.
Truth is not a democracy.
Try a little kindness. As little as possible.
"Try not to do anything stupid. Like gettin' yourself killed." (Lt. Dan)
Tschechische Chefchemiker auf griechisch-chinesischen Passagierschiffen
Tschechische Chefchemiker schubsen keusche chinesische Mönche in seichte Teiche.
Tschechische Regisseure schätzen schöne chinesische Schüsselchen.
Tubensenf an die Decke!
Tubensenf ist bekömmlicher, wenn man ihn vor dem Verzehr aus der Tube drückt.
Tuddas Nout däß däs hiä sou rumoxidiäät?
Tu Dein Maul nicht unnütz auf, sag was Kluges oder sauf!
Tu doch heute mal für irgendjemanden etwas Nettes: laß ihn einfach in Ruhe.
"Tür zu! Draußen is' kalt!" - "Meinst', davon wird's draußen wärmer?"
Tugenden kann man vortäuschen; Laster muß man wirklich haben.
Tugend ist, was wir aus Trägheit, Feigheit oder Dummheit nicht getan haben.
Tu, los: erleg' elf Flegel resolut! (Palindrom)
Tu niemals irgendetwas zum ersten Mal.
Tuning the kernel doesn't.
Tunk' nie Anna ein, Knut! (Palindrom)
Tunk nie ein Knie ein, Knut! (Palindrom)
Tu-ralu-ralu-ralu, ich mach' Bubu, was machst Du?
Tut Anch Amun, was Nofre täte?
'T was brillig, and the slithy toves did gyre and gimble in the wabe.
Two beer are not two beer?
Two's company, three's the Musketeers.
Two's company; three's the result.
Two witches watch two watches. Which witch watches which watch?
Two wrongs do not make a right, but two Wrights made an airplane.
Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left.
Type b (boot), c (continue), or n (new command mode) >
Typen wie Dich sollte man regelmäßig ankotzen und anschließend sauberpinkeln.
Typing your name can have magical effects when you're in vi command mode.
Typisch: Kaum verkauft man sein Auto - schon findet man einen Parkplatz!
Zuletzt aktualisiert: decet Sat Oct 19 14:26:32 2024